


The Wonderful Amazing Birth of a Baby

by cabintardlock



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: F/M, Humor, John Watson's Blog, Prompt Fill, Sherlock Kink Meme
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-04
Updated: 2014-08-04
Packaged: 2018-02-11 16:27:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2075013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cabintardlock/pseuds/cabintardlock
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Mary goes into labor, Sherlock makes it his job to document all of the details on John's blog. With pictures, of course.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Wonderful Amazing Birth of a Baby

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [this](http://sherlockbbc-fic.livejournal.com/22393.html?thread=132244857#t132244857) prompt on the kinkmeme.  
> Apologies for any inaccuracies, I only did minimal research for this. Unbeta'd and unbrit-picked.

### THE PERSONAL BLOG OF DR. JOHN H. WATSON

5th June

 

## The Wonderful Amazing Birth of a Baby

This is Sherlock Holmes. I tried my hand at John's ridiculous style of titling his posts. I believe the style is quite similar to his.

John had informed me before that he was going to post something when the baby was born, but John is far too frantic at the moment to write anything, so I'm writing it for him.

Mary has begun the first stage of labour, the latent phase. She begun experiencing regular uterine contractions 58 minutes ago, and we are currently at the hospital. The whole ride here, John was quite panicked and fussy as is his way. He is currently glued to Mary's side, and has yet to acknowledge that I'm here.

Mary's cervix is now dilated 3 cm. Her contractions are approximately 7 minutes apart.

Update: Mary's contractions are now 4 minutes apart. Her amniotic sac has also ruptured. It got all over John's shoes, but he hasn't noticed. Cervical effacement is now past 80% and her cervix has dilated to 5 cm. It's rather interesting, if not unsanitary. John is too busy soothing Mary's pain to document this, which is why I'm writing this post.

Update: It's been 4 hours. Mary has been swearing heavily and John looks exhausted, which is quite illogical as he has been doing nothing.

Update: At 7 hours, Mary's cervix is finally fully dilated at 10 cm. The doctor has informed us that Mary is entering the second stage of pregnancy, fetal expulsion. The baby's head is currently fully engaged in the pelvis, and we should see it's head soon.

Update: After a lot of encouragement and yelling on John's part, which in my opinion did no good, the baby's head has presented. It's hard to see, as it's just a little bump at the moment, but here it is.

Update: Mary is in much pain at the moment, with John alternating between comforting her and cooing at the baby, which obviously can't hear him. Ridiculous. The head is now fully visible, and one of the shoulders is being displayed. I have included a video of this.

Update: The full body has been delivered, and John is currently cutting the umbilical cord. Mary is rather purple in the face and still panting, but she seems relieved.

They both look elated, holding their new baby. Oh, John is waving me over. Here's the very first full picture of the baby.

Congratulations, John and Mary.

Sherlock Holmes

Consulting Detective and Godfather

**14 comments**

* * *

Sherlock, you really didn't need to put all this information up. Or the pictures. Still, congratulations you two! You and Mary should pop by for a cuppa so I can meet the little girl soon!  
 ****

Mrs. Hudson 5 June

* * *

 

Congrats mate! Although I really didn't need the pictures.

Mike Stamford 5 June

* * *

 

LOL those pics! But I'm happy for you john! XD

Harry Watson 5 June

* * *

 

now that all this ridiculous baby stuff is over can you please get back to blogging about interesting things 

theimprobableone 5 June

* * *

 

Are you kidding? It's gonna be all about the baby now. Congratulations John, we've come a long way haven't we?

Bill Murray 5 June

* * *

On one hand, ewww, but still you and Mary are adorable together!! <3

Donna Staveley 5 June

* * *

 

DO NOT WATCH THE VIDEO!!!!

Dame Latif 6 June

* * *

 

Sherlock, what is this? Why are my administrative privileges blocked?

John Watson 6 June

* * *

 

 

Sherlock! Take the pictures and the video down NOW!

John Watson 6 June

* * *

 

Very well, I've taken the pictures and video down. You happy now?

Sherlock Holmes 6 June

* * *

No, actually, take this whole post down! 

John Watson 6 June

* * *

Sorry John, can't do that. Forgot the password for the posting privileges.

Sherlock Holmes 6 June

* * *

We both know you wouldn't forget something like that!!

John Watson 6 June

* * *

Sherlock?!?!

John Watson 6 June

* * *

 

 

 

 

 


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